The wedding weekend was amazing and I must say, So was I.
We moved into the hotel Wednesday and shared the afternoon and evening with all of our friends and family. My mother and father, who rarely leave their home in Pa, came to stay at the hotel Wednesday night also. This was the first time seeing me since my diagnosis and I know it was a very anxious time for them both. My father told me he thought he was going to cry when he saw me but when he realized that I look and behave like myself it made acceptance much easier. I explained that I have a disease I am fighting called cancer but I am not cancer, I am still me.
Thursday morning I awoke at 4:00 am and could not sleep even with all the medication. I was so excited and by 7:00 Stephanie and I were on the phone visiting and sharing our excitement. My wonderful new daughter spent the day before her wedding searching stores to find a wrap to go with my original dress chosen for wedding. It seems due to the shots in my stomach, the dress I planned wear hurt in just the “right: spot when I sat down and I was miserably uncomfortable. The original dress was too big and needed accessories that I have been unable to go shopping for. Stephanie not only found the perfect wrap, but had my dress altered and pressed and delivered personally to the hotel the morning of her wedding.
I continued to try to rest but although I did spend the morning in bed, I slept very little. At 12:30 we all left the hotel for the 20 minute drive to the wedding hall. I immediately made a bed for myself on the sofa until make-up and hair time. Then on to pictures. Afterward, dress came off, and back to bed. Dress back on for rehearsal and then the wedding started to flow. I must admit I was quite tired at this time but many glasses of water and a lot of medication got me through it. It was miraculous what I was able to do as the evening wore on. I did have the beautiful dance with my son and visited with our guests and made a speech to boot. At 11:30Pm, I hit the wall and had to go back to my makeshift bed in the dressing room. Then people came there to visit with me. At 1:30 PM, back at the hotel, I finally slept like a baby.
Friday morning was much the same with breakfast and goodbyes with our guests and then on to NYC. We knew that Shira and Leo, and Josh and Katherine would be with us for Friday night and Shabbat dinner but Rea, Suie and the girls, Smi and Huvi, also moved in for the night. Jan and I ran to Bed Bath and Beyond for more airbeds and special blankets for the girls and 10 of us had dinner and slept in a 1200 sf apartment, so content to be together.
This morning I am doing well but a little tired but so happy that I am surrounded by my favorite people in the world. I have spent time reading to the girls and having brownies and milk in bed. Now I will try to take it easy and watch my magnificent family enjoy each other.
I am so grateful. I prayed since the day of my diagnosis to be able to walk Aaron down the aisle, walk Stephanie around him 7 times under the chuppah and have just one dance with my son, I was able to do all of these things with zeal and pride and especially grace. And I accomplished much much more than this. i faced my illness and handled it in a difficult situation with dignity. And I did not have to face my biggest fear. People did not pity or feel sorry for me or wish to discuss my health. They watched me enjoy this simcha with my entire heart. Thank you God.
Next goal: To hold my new grandson in eight weeks. May god continue to help me through these next chemo treatments so that this goal can also be reached. AMEN!
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